How to be interesting
Because being boring won’t take you anywhere
Are you boring? Or do you know someone who is?
Researchers in various studies have found that people would actually choose to give themselves a mild electric shock rather than sit alone without external stimuli. (You can read about one of the studies here: Self-inflicted pain out of boredom).
When you’re around someone that is no fun and there aren’t any machines to electrocute them with, the next thing to look for is escape. Being boring isn’t a crime, but maybe it should be.
Boring people bring your energy down whereas interesting people raise your vibration. Boring people leave you feeling uninspired and sometimes even tired. Who wants that?
Reasons to be interesting
There are two main reasons why everyone should be interesting, even if they naturally aren’t. The first reason is for yourself, and the second reason is for other people. By the way, the second reason is two-fold because even though it seems like it’s for others, it indirectly serves you as well. So here are the reasons:
You create a rich, full life for yourself
How many times have you found yourself bored with nothing to do?
Interesting people don’t usually find themselves in that situation. Now I’m not saying interesting people never get bored,( I mean, we’re human, it’s inevitable) but the chances are much lower because there’s so much for them to do or think of, with or without other people.
You impact others who in turn, impact you
Most interesting people naturally build relationships. People get interested in your thoughts and activities and they’re keen to network with you. That way, if you have a business, idea, or even a problem, people find it easier to connect with you and support you in whatever way they can.
Why you’re not interesting
Now there are tons of reasons why you or people you know aren’t the least bit interesting, but I’ve boiled it down into just a few:
Societal conditioning
I doubt it’s shocking or unusual to anyone that society can be blamed for the kind of people we turn out to be. Society is where we live, and wherever humans are, there are set rules created to prevent chaos. The problem with many of these rules is that even though they may prevent disorder, they breed conformity, and conformity means we don’t get to express ourselves as the “unique snowflakes” we all are.
From an early age, we’re told what to do and what not to do. We’re told what’s right and wrong, what we’re allowed to say and what we aren’t. While all these definitely have their place, it also means that we shut down parts of ourselves in order to be socially acceptable. More times than not, these are the parts that make us unique, imaginative and intriguing, because it’s the part that isn’t like everyone else.
Shame
We’ve all experienced shame and we’ve also shamed others at some point in our lives. Shame is unacceptance and it hurts because all human beings are designed to love, and when you don’t accept someone, it signals that there is a lack of love.
Think of the lengths people go to because of love. . . There’s little surprise that being shamed for doing certain things will cause you to stop doing those things if it means being accepted in return; we would rather be loved!
The comfort zone is too. . . comfortable
The biggest reason people don’t grow mentally, spiritually, physically, and even financially isn’t fear or lack of opportunity . . . it’s familiarity.
It’s in-built in us to seek comfort and pleasure. And while it’s not our fault that we’re designed that way, it’s still our duty to leave that comfort zone so that we can grow. Are you afraid to try new things? Are you uninspired to learn new concepts and skills? You just might be too comfortable!
The problem with that is, if you never leave your comfort zone, you’ll remain there. Nobody can push you out of it and take you somewhere else. Congratulations, you’ve given birth to a life of mediocrity.
You’re fake
Fake people are easy to spot. Their energy is inauthentic. From the beginning of the world, people have found reasons to be fake. Whether it’s to gain unmerited favour or fit in a higher social class, most people can tell when you’re being pretentious. I would describe being fake as taking a personality shortcut to where you want to be or an outcome you’re looking to get.
Despite your reasons, being fake can easily make you boring because you’re using extra effort to be something else, and people are rarely interested or invested in attitudes and personas that are not genuine.
How to be interesting
So then, the question arises: How can I be interesting? Can I be interesting even though I don’t think I naturally am? Is it something I can learn?
I’ve always hated questions like “Are leaders born or made?” or “Do you have talent in so and so?”
I think it’s bullshit to imply that because one is naturally gifted they don’t have to practice or because they are not naturally gifted, they can never learn. What then is the purpose of our brains?
To finish off my rant, YES, you can learn to be interesting! The good news is, it’s very easy. Here are the best ways I’ve found to do that:
Be authentic
The easiest way to be interesting is to just be yourself. No matter who you are, no matter how you are.
This means being honest about your values, your interests, your style, and your ideas. Not everything you like or think will actually be interesting to other people, but here’s the thing- people will listen to you not only when their interests align with yours, but also when you’re genuine and passionate about something!
Think about it, how many people have you listened to not because you care about what they’re talking about, but because they’re just so excited talking about it? Have you watched random videos that you don’t need to on Youtube because the person draws you in with what they’re saying and how they’re saying it? Or have you listened to a child’s ridiculous story because it’ so pure and down to earth? Maybe you’ve followed people on Instagram because they’re confident being weird or different.
Most people can spot when you’re being truly yourself and when you’re just pretending. It doesn’t matter if you’re talking about the latest celebrity news or the history of the plastic spoon, if you’re genuine about it, someone will care and take interest!
It’s easy to mould pretentious people to be who you want them to be, after all, they’ll do whatever it takes to gain what they want. But genuine people are completely themselves, they have nothing to lose by being who they are, and therein lies the interest in them.
Be interested
If you’ve ever sat down with someone you thought was interesting and they proceeded to talk non-stop for ten hours. . . you probably didn’t find them interesting anymore. All good conversationalists know that being interested in other people is part of being interesting.
Interesting people give room for others to talk. They know that a conversation is a two-way street, it’s not always about them.
So how can you be interested in other people? That’s simple, just get to know them.
Now the thing with this is that you have to be genuine. If you’re asking people questions just for the sake of asking, they’ll know. One way to be interested in others is to realize that everyone can be interesting because everyone’s experience of life is unique to them! They get interesting because you stop seeing life through your own eyes, and try seeing life through their eyes instead.
Dive in deeper
Dive in deeper by investing in yourself and other people.
Follow your interests passionately. Learn new skills in your line of work (and also outside your line of work). Do the things that make you happy. Do things that challenge you. Listen to peoples problems without judgement. Share what you know with those that need it. Inspire people by telling your story. Be inspired by people telling their story. Find the balance between work and play. Laugh often. Go ahead and follow all the cliche advice there is to be happy, after all, they became cliche’s because they’re reoccurring truths.
The perks
If you haven’t realized it by now, there are perks to being interesting. Like I said earlier, being interesting serves you, which serves other people, who serve you right back! It’s not just a win-win. It’s a win-win-win.
Personal growth
On the journey to being interesting, you learn and achieve a lot of things that you might not have even been looking to learn. Learning anything means that your consciousness is being expanded. When that expansion happens, that’s room to grow!
You end up becoming a better person for it, and the quality of your life steps up, even if it’s by just a little.
Opportunities
When you’re authentic and interested in other people, networking becomes a whole lot easier. With this oh-so global world that we live in, connecting with people from far and wide gives you the opportunity to find employment, business, mentorship, support, friendship, and even love!
Self-entertainment
You’re not likely to get bored enough to be electrocuted because you can entertain yourself! Need I say more?
Like with almost every other thing on Earth, practice makes perfect. Even people that are naturally interesting become more so because they keep doing the things that make them interesting and they make room to keep growing! Being boring is no fun and the only place it takes you is nowhere.
Do yourself and everyone else a favour: learn how to be interesting!
